Song: Faith Hill - One[grin]
Cheered me up well, last night, when I heard my handphone vibrating about insanely on the table. Saw that it was a whole chunk of numbers (meaning, an overseas call), picked it up, heard a familiar voice. Mighty great to hear
you again, babe :) Lovely surprise!
[/grin]
Sometimes I wonder if I worry too damn much.
I wonder if it's because of the way I'm brought up - the usual lame excuse.
Take for example, a friend asks me out for a day. These would be my worries as I get through the day.
I start to worry about... (Home issues)
- having to come up with an excuse for my gran, to get out of home.
- the time I'd have to beat to reach home in case my gran gets pissed off and affects my mum who'll start throwing her tantrums while cooking dinner.
- gran running off to complain to my uncles that i've been out too much. or too long.
- running out of excuses for the next time i'm gonna be out.
After that, if I see something I like out there, I worry about...
- spending too much. (they're usually my mum's money, though I use my savings half the time, but she's sorta like 'replenishing' my little savings.)
- buying it and not liking or using it soonafter.
- seeing a better one later and regretting my purchase.
The 'home issues' is a more pressing problem, really. To such extent I was telling my brother and he replied, "If you're so worried, then don't go out."
Struck me hard. My brother gets away with, "I'm going out for a while" which usually means he'll be back at midnight. I'd feel bad if I said I'm going out for
a while. Cos when I
do say I'm going out for a while, it's for an emergency, needing to get something, then returning home once I'm done with getting what I need. That, my friend, is
a while.
Snort. I'm
quite sure if my gran's not staying with us, I could easily tell my mum, I'll be out with my friends. I'll be shopping. (Hell, she'd even be passing me all her discount cards.) And I could tell her, I'm not gonna be home for lunch. Or dinner. She trusts me enough, really.
With my gran, if I'm out for lunch, I'd better be home for dinner. If I'm out for dinner I'd better give an excuse. Like perhaps an evening movie. Or a barbeque. Or a friend's birthday dinner, etc. Otherwise, her tongue would go wagging for more.
So how on earth did I survive 16 years? I've been wanting to find out how I did.
Yes, I am going out today. For dinner. I've yet to tell her (my gran) and this is annoying me.
How can such silly problems be wearing me out?
4 Comments:
i understand n empathize. hang in there with the whole grandma thing. maybe you should have a talk with her. it sorta worked for me.
talking. haha. she sees me talking to her in a different light. like 'm trying to rebel or retort. like i've mixed with bad company and all that shite. :)
i've grown to lie to her through my teeth and not feel bad about it. =p
hmm... well tell her it's time for you to do grown up stuff n it isn't like some sort of rebellion. if she doesn't give at least a little space, then maybe you'll really rebel. maybe it helped that my bro was such a rebel. haha as he constantly reminds me.
hahaha, no seriously, doesn't work that way with my gran...
i'll just go do what i do best. sneakily. :)
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